When You Stop Being Angry, More People Listen

Image: Public Domain, Morguefile
Image: Public Domain, Morguefile

The world is not always a good place, and we often want to scream and swear about it. However, when you take a calmer approach, you can get more people to listen to what you have to say.

I noticed this trend both in my real life, and in my blogging. When you’re griping and yelling about something that upsets you, you might get people to say “yeah, that sucks” or maybe they start screaming about it too, but not much is actually accomplished with it. However, if you talk about what’s upsetting you, and you explain why, you can get other people talking about it in an intelligent manner, and it has much more positive effect.

For example, I had written a scathing blog post about the stupidity of people in chat rooms online. I swore and ranted, and I got a few agreeing, albeit short, responses. Later, I wrote about the same topic, and while I did express my displeasure, I explained why, and what people could do to avoid annoying others online. It got much better comments, and I actually educated a few people who didn’t know that using all caps in a chat room is considered screaming.

I’ve continued to see that as I write in a calm and educational fashion, more people listen to what I have to say. I’m no longer a raving mad woman, I’m viewed with respect. I’m often complimented for the way I handle touchy topics. I suggest that others take a hint from my experience. If something’s got you hot under the collar, take a few minutes to calm down and think about it before you post a grand rant about it. You could post a fantastic article that will really get people thinking instead.

This also applies in real life. I’m sure you know someone that really gets on your nerves. Have you ever noticed that when you yell at them and argue with them, it just gets worse? If you complain to other people about them, it’s not much help either. If you take a breath and deal with them in a calmer fashion, or just ignore them, it gets far better results. The same is true when talking to people in person about things that bother you.

If you’re an article writer or a blogger, you may be prone to talking about hot-button topics. If it gets you worked up, feel free to express that, but do it in a way that makes people really think. Be sure to explain why something irks you. Saying beauty pageants make you want to gag is all well and good, but if you say that it’s because of the premature sexualisation of young girls, or the potential long-term image and health issues it can create, people will really start thinking about the topic, and sharing those thoughts with others.

So, think before you go off on a rant. You’ll get better results with a well thought out argument than with a lot of swearing and anger.

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