You’re Failing As A Parent, Just Look At Society

Father Family Parent Children
Image: Public Domain, Morguefile

My recent experience with the raging ignorance on the internet left me with one thought screaming in my head: Parents are obviously falling down on the job. We blame a lot of what’s going on in the world on the media, and we’re not really wrong to do so, but parents have a responsibility to teach their children right from wrong and raise them into worthy adults. Those parents have the ability to tell their kids what is good and bad for them, and they have the power to change what the media is showing their children.

It seems that somewhere along the line, people forgot what it means to be a parent. Being a parent means that it is your job, your absolute responsibility, to raise your children into the best people they can be. You are charged with teaching them the lessons that they need to know to become good and useful adults. You are there to do everything in your power to control the influences that affect your child, and to stand up and make change when those influences are obviously not for the greater good.

The multitude of offensive and disgusting memes floating around the internet is just one example of how things have gone wrong. If people are growing up to enjoy and be amused by these things, there was obviously some lacking in the parenting department. Good parents would have taught their children to respect themselves and others. Good parents would teach their kids not to drink in excess, not to do drugs, not to abuse anyone. A parent who’s doing it right would teach their children that rape and violence are never funny or okay. But look around and you see that these messages are obviously not reaching today’s youth. So what are the parents doing? Why aren’t they taking charge of their offspring and teaching them the right things?

Even though the media does have a great amount of influence on people, both young and older, the media is shaped by the people with money. If parents don’t like the messages being sent to their young, they have the right and the power to put that money to work. Stop buying from companies that send dangerous or offensive messages. Support companies and causes that send the right messages. Make calls, write letters, speak out and make a change in the world to reduce those influences that are damaging your children. If nothing else, a parent can absolutely take measures to disallow negative influences within their own home. They can encourage the things that will help shape their kids into worthwhile adults.

And I know many will argue, but I don’t think it’s ever too late to take control of your kids. Whether they’re 5 or 35, you’re still their parent. If they’re doing things and exposing themselves to things that are detrimental, you can always say something. Offer them alternatives to the negative influences. Tell them that you love them and explain why what they’re doing and experiencing is wrong. Even if you’ve been a horrible, absent parent for years, you can start changing today, and commit to that change. Even if you think you did everything right and your child turned out wrong, you can try harder starting today, and commit to that effort.

If parents keep throwing their hands up in disgust, trying to blame the media or other kids for the way their own children are turning out, things won’t get better. Being a parent isn’t an option, it’s a requirement as soon as that life comes into the world. You are responsible for that life every day until you die. That’s not meant to be a burden, it’s a gift and a chance for you to change the world through the person that you raise and let out into the world. If you have a child, you have to do that. You have to do every single thing in your power (which is more than most people think) to help your child grow into the best possible person. So start now, and stop making excuses.


2 thoughts on “You’re Failing As A Parent, Just Look At Society

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  1. I believe it all boils down to parents wanting to be friends first, parents second. Being a parent means that you will make tough decisions that your children may disagree with and possibly even cause the dreaded words “I hate you!” to be uttered by their children.
    Too many parents fear loosing that they’ll destroy a friendship by being the parent. Unfortunately, today’s parents use and are swayed by the messages in today’s media when they attempt to be a parent. Most of those messages are telling them that their children are to be treated as an equal and that you should never hurt their feelings. Leveling of the playing field in all aspects of life is also a popular message. Adjusting of the bell curve by dumbing down tests, turn off the score board, apologize when you beat another team by too many points. Heck, one school district fines coaches $250 if they beat another team by a predetermined number of points.
    The children of today are coddled and protected from having hurt feelings or experiencing adversity. Children are no longer expected to just do their chores, they have to be “rewarded” bribed and then thanked profusely for simply doing what is expected of them. When talking to parents who have children that are selfish, do not listen or don’t contribute without a bribe. Most will simply blow it off and attribute it to it just being normal, teenage behavior. It’s not. It’s a learned behavior and is allowed to survive because again, parents want to be a friend first and a parent second.


    1. There’s a limit to being your child’s friend. I agree, you’re supposed to be a parent first.
      Fined for beating a team by too much? Seriously? that’s ridiculous. It used to be that a good tromping by another team or player was motivation to learn to be better.
      I keep saying that PC has gone too far. You can’t possibly never hurt someone’s feelings. It’s going to happen. I don’t see any need to be cruel, but being firm is a good thing. A boss shouldn’t be walked over by employees, and a parent shouldn’t be walked over by kids. being a parent and a boss are pretty much the same thing, except you can’t fire your kids.
      Another part of the problem is that everything is labeled as abuse these days. You didn’t see as much of this crap when a parent was allowed to smack their kid on the ass or make them go to their room without supper. But now that’s considered cruelty. let me tell you, I have stories of cruelty. Discipline is very different, and very needed. I can’t stand this “time out” nonsense.
      And parents are just messed up these days. I’ll never forget seeing a woman talk about her poor darling child needing expensive therapy because he had an “eating disorder”. What was the disorder? he wouldn’t eat white food and would even have fits seeing other people eat white food. I wanted to reach through the computer, grab her, smack her, and tell her to make the damn kid eat his food. The gentler me suggested she imply be a parent and instruct the child to eat what’s fed to them and disallow the disruptive behavior. It was really hard to be polite on that one.


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